Women are half of the humanity. They are the cause of our very being and constitute the essential and integral part of our society. The world would have been barren without them. Allah (SWT) has endowed them with unique qualities like affection, tenderness, emotions and grace. Be it a mother, sister, daughter, or wife, their contribution to our life is immense and cannot be substituted. Her nature, a blessing out and out, has been misunderstood as her weakness by those who lack to perceive her destined role in the family and society. Those responsible for such a misunderstanding have failed to determine her status in the community and have disputed about her role. While some considering her a social need have advocated that there is no difference between man and woman. This flawed outlook has deprived woman of her femininity. Former societies considered her a burden for her being incapable of riding a horse, handling a sword or participating in plunder and loot. Against all such distorted views, Islam is the only religion which has given woman the status in accordance to her nature and determined her rights and duties according to the chemistry of her personality. Islam gave woman that dignity which no other ideology or faith has ever given.
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Let us travel back into history to trace how a woman was treated in pre-Islamic society. A certain ritual was performed by the son, not by the daughter for the salvation of parents in Hinduism, which is indicative of woman?s inferior status. She had no share in inheritance, had no right to seek divorce, and was considered an item of property.
In another faith group, woman is considered dirty for 7 days after the birth of a son and 15 days after the birth of a daughter, and she has the right to inherit only if there is no male heir. In another faith group, she was given a still lower status because it was the fault of Eve/ Ha?u?wwa, (AS) and not of Adam (AS) that the first couple had to be ejected from Paradise and all succeeding generations of man from Adam on continue to carry the burden of that first sin attributed only to Eve.
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It was under these circumstances that Prophet (SAW) raised woman?s status to a height which was never given to her before. She was empowered to lead a dignified life and commanded respect and honor. A woman?s passes through three main phases in her life: First she is some one?s daughter, then she becomes a wife, and then she becomes a mother. Islam?s bestows upon her a special importance and dignity in all three spheres.
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In the pre-Islamic period, daughters were buried alive. Islam condemned such a crime in the strongest terms. Prophet (SAW) defined it as a great virtue to look after daughters. He (SAW) said that he, who has two daughters and takes care of them in a befitting manner, he and I will be in paradise like this.? (He (SAW) joined his two fingers to emphasize the point.) In one of the traditions the number of daughter is given as 3. One companion
asked: ?Yaa Rasul Allah, what if a person has only one daughter?? He (SAW) replied: ?He will earn the same reward.? People used to get sad and depressed on the birth of a daughter before Islam. The Holy Qur?an says in verse 17 of Surah Zukhruf:
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?When one of them is given news of the birth of a daughter, such as he so readily ascribes to the Lord of Mercy, his face grows dark and his filled with gloom??
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Prophet (SAW) showed an exemplary treatment of love and affection for his daughters. When asked as to who was loved most by Prophet (SAW), Ummul Momineen Aa?yesha (RAnha) replied that it was Fatima (RAnha). When his illustrious daughter Fatima (RAnha) used to visit our beloved Prophet (SAW) used to greet her by standing, kissing her forehead and having her sit in his place. She (RAnha) was the last to be visited when Prophet (SAW) used to go on journey and first to be visited when he (SAW) returned from it. He (SAW) considered the father as responsible to support the daughter until she is married. Father?s support is supposed to continue in case she becomes a widow or is divorced, but in the case of a son, father has the option to support him until his adulthood. Finding a suitable match for the girl is also the duty of parents. In Islam daughters are entitled to inheritance like sons.
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An exemplary dispute out of love arose between Ali (RA), Jafar (RA) and Zaid bin Harisa (RA) about the guardianship of Hamza?s daughter Umama (RAnha). This happened soon after the conquest of Makkah. Ali said that she was his uncle?s daughter, Jafar (RA) claimed that she was not only his uncle?s daughter, but her aunt was also his wife, where as Zaid (RA) said that her father was tied to him by the strong bonds of Islamic brotherhood. Prophet (SAW) gave his verdict in favor of Jafar (RA) because according to Prophet (SAW) aunt i.e. mother?s sister is equal to mother in terms of status.
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Prophet (SAW) has advised husbands to treat their wives with great respect, kindness and love. His (SAW)?s life clearly sets an example as to how a husband should treat his wife. The importance of an ideal behavior towards wife is highlighted by the fact that Prophet (SAW) mentioned her rights also in his last sermon. He (SAW) said: ?The best among you is he, who has best manners, and the one who is good mannered is he, who is good and nice to his wife.? He (SAW) further said: ?I am the best among you in treating the members of my household.? He (SAW) entrusted all responsibilities with regards to wife to her husband. According to Islamic Shariah, wife?s needs of livelihood including food, drink, dress, treatment, medication, and accommodation, fulfillment of all personal and domestic needs are the responsibility of her husband. Verse 19 of Surah Nisa says:
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?You who believe, it is not lawful for you to inherit women against their will, nor you should treat your wives harshly, hoping to take back some of the bride-gift you gave them, unless they are guilty of something clearly outrageous. Live with them in accordance with what is fair and kind: if you dislike them, it may well be that you dislike something in which Allah has put much good.?
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In the light of this verse, one has to treat his wife very kindly and respectfully. Prophet (SAW) was extremely considerate and kind towards his family members. Once in a light mood, Prophet (SAW) told his wife Ummul Momineen Aa?yesha (RAnah): ?I know when you are happy or unhappy with me. While unhappy you say: ?I swear by the Rab of Ibrahim, and while happy, you swear as by the Rab of Muhammad.? Ummul Momineen smiled and replied: ?This is simply limited to verbal expression; you in fact are very close to my heart at all times.? That doesn?t show only his ideal relations with his wife, but a thorough understanding of her mood and disposition.
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Much discussion is going on these days about women?s rights; I will discuss more on the subject in the next Friday?s Khutbah.
Why does a father get depressed at the news of a daughter?s addition in his family? Why does a mom long for a son when gets conceived every time? Why does a brother hesitate to accompany a sister when going outside? Look around and read more if you find such familiar questions around you. You must have heard people burying their daughters alive in the dark ages. You must have heard about Arabs of old ages losing their daughters in the game of chess. You must have heard about ignorant and uncivilized tribes marrying their daughters with their Holy Books? Have you? I am sure you must have heard.
A ?Child?, who needs to be protected and nurtured by the elders of the society, is vulnerable because of being an easy victim of discrimination on cultural, social, and religious or gender based prejudices. Thus, child-rearing practices raise a baby girl into a woman that is desired by the family or the culture. Most of the gender-based issues are followed in the name of religion. And more than 80% of the world population is practicing some religion or faith. More than half of the world is following Abrahamic religions (Judaism, Christianity, Islam) and Islam is the second largest religion in the world.
Islam is known as an educational, social revolution in Arab that brought about lot of changes to eliminate all type of discrimination and to promote human rights on the basis of equality and equity. But, unfortunately, today there are certain traditional and cultural practices in different Muslim societies, which deprive women of certain rights that are granted by Islam. This discrimination starts even before the birth of a child (e.g abortion in case if the expected child is a girl) and continues throughout the child rearing and afterward. Education, inheritance, freedom of choice and opinion, standard of modesty and tolerance are so much gender based that even a mother desire to have male children for a respectable status in the family. This article will briefly look into some important Islamic perspectives about bringing up a baby-girl into a woman, which are missing in many Muslim societies due to lack of knowledge or lack of sincere intention.
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Related posts:
- Daughters in Islam
- Rights of women in our society and Islam
Source: http://www.pakpakistan.org/daughters-and-society/
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